If one can train themselves to think more positively and look at events more optimistically, one can be happier.

In this chapter, our first topic will deal with optimism; one of the most highly reported traits of happy people. Here, we shall explore the ways in which optimism leads to a happier life. There are several sides to it, and in this chapter we shall look at each of them. After that, we shall incorporate what we've learned about optimism in a more global view of positive thinking and its relationship to overall happiness.

OPTIMISM, THE SAVING GRACE

Optimism, as defined by Webster's Dictionary is "the tendency to take the most hopeful or cheerful view of matters." It is a belief that things work out for the best. The opposite of optimism is pessimism: the view that things work out for the worst, and that events are to be seen in their most negative and critical light.

In essence, optimism and pessimism represent opposite ends of a continuum upon which all events in life are interpreted. How any particular event is interpreted varies greatly from person to person. Some people can interpret almost any event in a positive light; others interpret virtually any event in it's most negative light. As the old adage says, it's the difference between "seeing the cup half-full or half-empty." But when it comes to happiness, this difference makes all the difference in the world.

Optimism, as we shall come to see, is indeed "the saving grace" of happy people.

THE "MISSING LINK"

These two volumes of Human Happiness have, so far, largely placed a great deal of emphasis on objective circumstance when it comes to happiness in life. In reviewing the major research findings, as we did in Volume I, it was clear that "happy people have it made!" There we saw that happy people -- on a broad statistical level -- tend to enjoy higher incomes, good health, greater occupational success, better marriages, social acceptance, higher educational attainment, optimal mental health, personal competency, and many other fine things. In the present Volume, dealing with the attainment of happiness, we have reiterated many of the same themes regarding happiness, but have focused our discussions on the specific areas of the kinds of fun, social, and meaningful activities in which happy people typically excel.

Overall, the collected data would appear to elect only the most popular and accomplished individuals as the best candidates for being happy. But, in fact this has never been the case. By in large, the "model" of happiness researchers have built has been primarily a statistical one. Therefore, when, for example, we state that "higher income correlates to happiness:" in general, this is true. But it does not mean that all wealthy people are happy, nor does it mean that all poorer individuals are unhappy. The statement is merely a "statistical trend." It means that in most cases, the statement is true, but in a few cases it doesn't apply. It means that, for the most part, wealthy people are happier than poorer people, but the statement doesn't preclude the fact that a substantial fraction of rich individuals are actually quite unhappy while a significant minority of poor people are remarkably happy.

Income is just one small example. There appear to be relative large statistical exceptions to every one of the major findings in happiness research. Although educational attainment, marital status, social involvement, occupational level, personality make-up, and the many other factors we've examined in these Volumes all show substantial contributions to happiness -- no one of them, alone, appears to consistently distinguish a happy from an unhappy person.

The fact that no one happiness-factor can claim any uniform preeminence in the data has been frustrating to happiness researchers. It would be nice to report to the public, after all our years of work and effort, that "love" was the answer, or that "success" would pay-off best. But such a single "key factor" simply hasn't emerged.

Even more frustrating, when happiness researchers have combined all the established happiness-factors in one composite blend -- as been done in many studies (citing ) -- there still seems to be something missing. No matter how we've tried to analyze it, and no matter how much the larger "statistical trends" argue against it, we still find anomalies in our data. Despite the significantly strong indications in our data that "having it made" makes people happy, we continue to find a rare handful of individuals who appear to have most every blessing life has to offer who are unhappy, as well as those who appear to have next to nothing who appear to be remarkably happy.

What accounts for these discrepancies? Apparently, it has to do with how one views their circumstances, not what their circumstances are. As we shall see below, no matter how well, or poorly, one's life goes in objective terms may not matter all that much when it comes to happiness. What matters more is how optimistically or pessimistically one tends to see it.

Optimism, then, is "the missing link" that helps explain why objective data, alone, cannot fully account for the differences found between happy and unhappy people.

HOW OPTIMISM WORKS

There seems to be something significant in their tendency to look on "the brighter side" which contributes to their happiness. Yet, to explain how optimism works for happy people, however, we need to break-down the mechanisms a bit, for "optimism" is ordinarily defined in several different ways.

Over the years, I have come to see that "optimism" is defined primarily in matters of tense. Its definition changes depending on whether one is referring to the past, the present, or the future. In the future-tense, "optimism" is a faith that things to come will be for the best. In the present-tense, "optimism" tends to view current circumstances in their most favorable terms. And, in the the past-tense, "optimism" is a way of remembering previous times in our lives in the most positive light.

THAT WHICH HAS ALREADY HAPPENED ...

Most people tend to look on the bright side of the events which happen to them, when seen from the hind-sight of memory. By in large, most of us tend to be "memory-optimists" according to psychological research (130). In other words, most people tend to remember their past in rather favorable terms. Despite how bad circumstance may have actually been, the majority of people tend to remember only the best of past memories -- and their overall impression of previous times is generally "up-beat." This is not always the case, however, for as we shall examine in the next Chapter, many people often find themselves caught in a mental state filled with more unhappy, than happy, memories from the past.

It seems, for most people, time has a way of softening the harsh blows of life. Yesteryear is generally seen in an optimistic light. This is largely due to the fact that in past memory, we generally tend to recall and focus upon only the best memories from the past. Furthermore (thankfully), the human mind appears to have a built-in tendency to erase the more painful aspects of our experiences from its memory, thus, our remembrances are rarely plagued by these.

It is in our past recollections, then, that most of us are like happy people. Our occasional tendency to focus on the more positive aspects of each experience in memory is what happy people do all the time...

OPTIMISM IN THE PRESENT

When memory fades into the past, it is easy to select only the best situations to recall. But in the present, when one is actually living through the everyday events of life, it is difficult to always see things positively. Yet here is where happy people shine compared to the rest of us: they are able to see most any event happily...

In the last chapter we presented a mathematical model of happiness:

FH = (AE) x (EXP)

There we said that "felt happiness" (FH) equaled the "actual events" that happen in our lives (AE) which are modulated by a function of the "expectations" (EXP) we forecast about the event. Our analysis suggested that happiness can only be partially explained by good or bad circumstance. The "expectations" we have, has just as much to do with our happiness as do the actual circumstances.

In other words, how happy we are with a situation has just as much to do with the situation itself as it does how much we hoped to get from the situation.

Now, we have another factor to add to our formula: the factor of optimism (OPT). Adding this factor, the formula reads:

FH = (AE) x (EXP) x (OPT)

Here, we see, that "felt happiness" (FH) equals the "actual events" that happen in our lives (AE) which are modulated by a function of the "expectations" (EXP) we forecast about the event, AND by the function of "optimism" (OPT) -- how we view the event once it has occurred. According to the formula (all other factors being equal) "felt happiness" will be determined by how we tend to interpret the event. The interpretation can range from negative (pessimistic) to positive (optimistic).

Happy people tend to see what happens to them in the most positive and optimistic way possible. Unhappy people typically perceive things in the most negative, pessimistic, critical light possible.

What difference does this make in real life? It's all a matter of interpretation when it comes to happiness...

Your child is selected to attend a special summer program for talented students. Is this a wonderful family opportunity, or do you start to worry about the expenses involved?

For the first time since you've been working for the company, your boss invites you to join him at his country club. Is it a promotion he has in mind, or are you about to be fired?

You discover that the neighbors are having a party and they didn't invite you. Are you being purposely snubbed?  Or is it a party for their work associates, to which you, quite understandably, wouldn't be asked?

You find a missing check for a $1,000.00 you forgot to record or deposit. Is this joyous "found money?"  Or do you immediately start to worry about the I.R.S. ?

Your sweetheart writes you a little note which says, "You're going to get it tonight!" Are you in for a special treat? Or are you in for a serious chewing-out?

Much of life is ambiguous, to say the least! Most events are subject to a great deal of latitude when it comes to their interpretation. Thus, in the above scenarios, the interpretation makes quite a difference.

If one were to look at each of these situations optimistically, the story might look quite pleasant! Your child has been selected for a wonderful opportunity, your boss has invited you to his country club (maybe you've got that promotion), you neighbors have spared you the need to go to a party at which you'd be out of place, you're $1,000.00 richer, and you sweetheart has lovingly promised that "you're going to get it tonight!"

On the other hand, from a pessimistic point of view, these same situations could be seen as a nightmare! That "summer program" for your kid is going to cost a bundle. The boss is planning to fire you. Your neighbors don't like you. That $1,000.00 is going to land you in Federal Tax Court. And your sweetheart's note -- "you're going to get it tonight!" -- means you shouldn't go home at all!

If you had to choose which way to look at these particular events, which way would make you happier? There is little doubt that the optimistic interpretation is the happier of the two. Here we had the same series of events seen from two different perspectives: one optimistic; one pessimistic. Clearly, the optimistic viewpoint, if one can manage it, creates a happier way of looking at these same circumstances. Indeed, as you read the two ways of assessing these events, which one left you with a happier feeling?

Herein, lies the importance of an optimistic, positive interpretation of events with regard to personal happiness. An optimistic viewpoint leads to a positive view of events. A positive view of events creates more pleasant feelings regarding them. And pleasant feelings are the basic building blocks of overall human happiness.

A WALK IN THE PARK

Here's a story of an Optimist and a Pessimist who decide to join one another for a Saturday walk together in a public park:

Early Saturday morning, both awoke and readied themselves for their get-together.The Optimist awoke with anticipation of a beautiful day; the Pessimist, with his typical negativity, anticipated another "lousy" day.

Upon meeting in the park, the Optimist greeted his pessimistic friend saying, "It's a beautiful day! I'll bet we see all kinds of wonderful things!"

The Pessimist grumbles something to himself and thinks, "I doubt we'll see anything close to wonderful at all."

Down their path, they happen to spot a young man offering to help a little old lady having trouble carry her shopping bags...

The Optimist says, "Now isn't that nice! Look at that helpful young man. You can't say young people are all inconsiderate these days."

"Are you kidding?" retorts the Pessimist, "Give him a few steps down the block, and he'll be running off with those bags!"

Next, a couple of dogs romp playfully across their path being chased by some children...

"Isn't that a wonderful sight?" the Optimist suggests.

"Wonderful?" the Pessimist replies, "It's disgusting! Why they allow animals in the park is inexcusable! I can't count the many times I've stepped in dog droppings here. And where are those kids parents, anyway? Why aren't they minding their kids like they should?"

Further on, a couple of jazz musicians are playing for a spontaneously gathering crowd...

"Now this is so nice! What talent they have," the Optimist thinks, "I think they're worth putting a dollar in their donation hat. They deserve a little something for this wonderful music."

"Are you crazy?" the Pessimist says as he grabs the Optimist's arm, "This is all just a rip-off! They'll just use the money to buy drugs! I've heard about these kinds. They make hundreds of thousands of dollars a year doing this -- mostly from fools like you!"

A bit later, they spy a couple embracing passionately in a secluded spot...

"Wow," the Optimist implores, "you can't say that isn't truly beautiful! It remind me of when I was young and in love. At least romance is still alive and well these days."

"Beautiful?" the Pessimist exclaims, "It's despicable! There ought to be a law against public displays of affection. It just makes me ill!"

Later that evening, both the Optimist and the Pessimist are at home, and each receive a long-distance call from a close friend. In both cases, the conversation turns to how each spent their day.

When asked, the Optimist tells his friend, "It was a wonderful day. You should have been there! I took a walk in the park and saw so many nice people. There was fun and good-will everywhere..."

For the Pessimist, the report is quite different. "Your lucky you live where you do," he tells his friend. "I took a walk in the park today, and you wouldn't believe how bad things were. It's a jungle out there!"

Who was right and who was wrong?

Maybe the Optimist is right. Maybe the world if full of many "wonderful" things. On the other hand, maybe the Pessimist is right. Maybe the world is full of "rotten" things.Objectively, there is ample, real-life evidence to support either position. But whatever the evidence, being "right" or "wrong" is not the issue here. What matters is:

Who ended-up more happily at the end of the day?

LIFE IS ESSENTIALLY NEUTRAL

Most occurrences in life are open to an extraordinary amount of personal interpretation, because they are actually neutral to begin with. Without a human being around to place a value on events, events themselves are essentially valueless.

Lightning starts a fire and decimates a beautiful forest which no person has ever seen. A volcano erupts, flowing lava over the site of a village -- a village which has been uninhabited for over a thousand years. An earthquake exposes a vein of pure gold a mile long. A distant star is born, creating the spark for simple life-forms. The Earth, itself, is obliterated by a giant asteroid.

Are such events good or bad? Without a man or woman there to evaluate them, the question is moot. These events, and indeed all events, are neutral and valueless without our human ability to judge them. They have no meaning at all. They are not good. They are not bad. They just are...

Does the rock on a the face of a cliff care if it has been moved by an landslide? Does the moon care that one of it's sides never sees the Sun? Does a rain drop care whether it falls on land or out at sea?

Actually, the universe is a pretty neutral place. Worlds come and go, species exist and cease to exist, things change rapidly or remain constant for eons. Who is say what is good or bad? For we humans, the answer is clear: it is us!

We are the ones who decide -- both on a cultural level and on an individual level -- what is good and what is bad. We impose our value judgements on an essentially neutral world. We have decided that death is bad, that murder is evil, that gold is desirable, and that birth is good. As Shakespeare put it long ago, " 'tis nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so."

We humans decide what has meaning in this world. We impose our views of "goodness" and "badness" upon what is, in actuality, a neutral situation. We are the ones who pronounce that things are "significant" or "insignificant." We are are the ones who determine what is "important" or "irrelevant." We decide what is "virtuous" and what is "base." We select the things which hold value and separate them from those things which have no value. We dictate what is "right" from "wrong."

The world doesn't care how we interpret it. It only matters to us...

Assuming a completely neutral world (one in which nothing is really good or bad); and further, assuming that each of us impose our own interpretation of the events which occur in this world; then how happy or unhappy we will feel depends on how we interpret the events which occur. Furthermore, assuming most events are actually neutral, there's no reason why all of them might not be seen in a positive, happy light. Given the essential neutrality of the world, a positive interpretation of events could keep us happy all the time!

Can any event be interpreted positively? Assuming a world in which all events are neutral, the answer would be, "yes!" Yet as biological creatures, encumbered with pain and pleasure receptors, there is much about our physical existence that are absolute. Certain physical agonies and pleasures may defy every attempt at psychological interpretation. Based on our biological undercarriage, an aching wound may always be interpreted as "bad" and a full stomach as "good." But such biological examples are the exception to "neutrality," not the rule. And even these extreme examples appear open to differing interpretations: the man with the aching wound might, optimistically, envision himself as a possible hero; the woman with the full stomach might complain as to how lacking the meal she had was.

In everyday terms, neutrality is all around us. The day is full of insignificant events which are open to our own interpretation. We hear the company executives laughing in the hallway. Are they laughing at a joke, or derogating us? We hear a colleague muttering something as she passes by. Is she mad at us, or are they angry about something else? Someone is staring at us in a crowd. Do they find us flawed; do they think we're attractive; or are they from the F.B.I.? We'll never know for sure. So why not interpret that the executives are laughing at a joke, the colleague is angry about something else, and that the person in the crowd found us especially attractive?

Most everyday situations are so value-neutral we'll never figure them out -- nor, will we ever find out, for sure, what is actually going on. So why make yourself miserable about them, when you can think the best about them?

IT'S NOT WHAT YOU HAVE -- 
IT'S HOW YOU VIEW WHAT YOU HAVE...

An optimistic view is crucial to happiness! After all, what good are things like wealth, good health, high status, success, friendly social relations, and a warm family life, if a person does not see them as good?

Initially, when researchers began studying happiness, there was an assumption that human happiness might easily be explained in terms of what a person had -- exclusively in objective terms. Taking any objective standard, (like annual income, for an example), and you'd find pronounced differences between happy and unhappy people -- and that, in turn, would explain it all!

Yet, as we outlined above, there is no one, single factor that, by itself, can create happiness; nor can any combination of the known, objective happiness-factors account for the individual differences we find in the happiness data.

Now bear in mind that no researchers, to date, have had the opportunity to examine all the possible objective happiness-factors together in one exhaustive study. There are so many which might be relevant, that it would take a super-computer to distill all the information. Yet, even if this could be done, the evidence, so far, would suggest that there would still be a significant percentage of the difference between happy and unhappy people which would remain unaccounted for.

As we have indicated, there is a "missing-link." A hidden factor, which accounts for the fact that some people can be happy with nothing and others unhappy with everything.

Historically, this "missing-link" was discovered several decades ago. Years before rigorous studies on happiness began, opinion researchers had often examined, what is termed, "life-satisfaction." Numerous opinion polls of Americans and Western Europeans were conducted querying the various aspects of their lives. Such research began in the early 1940's, and has continued to the present day. In questionnaires, interviews, and phone calls, citizens have been asked how "satisfied" they have been with practically everything from their "national government," to their "local schools," to their "sex life."

What is interesting to our discussion, was the general finding -- over many decades of polling -- that "satisfaction" with one's general circumstances had only a moderate relationship to how "happy" a person happens to be (7, 108, 130, 133, 154, etc.). Virtually without exception, every study which has compared "satisfaction with circumstances" and "happiness" has shown these two factors to be somewhat different. Although, in general, the more satisfied one is with their life-circumstances the happier they are, there are some people who are quite satisfied with the way the major aspects of their life who are unhappy, and some who find their circumstances dissatisfying who are happy in spite of them.

For most of us, real-life experience confirms this idea. Certainly, each of us has run into a few people who mystify us when it comes to happiness. In some cases, it happens when we come to know a person who appears to have "everything in life," but strikes us as very unhappy. In other cases, it happens when we meet a person who has virtually nothing, yet seems extremely happy.

Such individuals tend to shake our basic faith in the nature of happiness, as we understand it. How can a person who has everything be unhappy? And how can a person who has nothing be happy? It defies common logic, but it happens...

Though statistically it is rare, there appear to be many individuals who have all of life's blessings, yet remain relatively unhappy. Such individuals would seem, on paper, to have everything one could wish for in terms of the objective factors which the research has found to make for happiness. They have high incomes and social status; they are married; they have good health; they live an active life-style; etc.. Yet despite their clearly objective success in every important area of life, they remain unhappy people.

Likewise, there are others who seem to have little among the factors we know that contribute to happiness, who are extremely happy anyway. Statistically, such individuals are also rare, but the ones who do exist are most inspirational. Despite an objective situation of poverty, low social status, poor health, and constant difficulties, they seem to manage an uncannily high degree of happiness. These are people who score low on every known happiness-factor -- yet they are, inexplicably, very happy.

Apparently, the difference boils down to how they view their circumstances -- the "missing link" of optimism. It is simply a matter of "seeing the cup half-full, or half-empty."

It seems that some individuals view life so critically and pessimistically, that no matter how much they have, they still view their life as lacking. Such people can live in a mansion in the nicest neighborhood in town, and still feel deflated when a larger mansion is built by someone down the street. They can own two Mercedes, and feel jealous when their neighbor can afford three. They travel to Monte Carlo twice a year, and feel disappointed that they can't live there year-round. They have every advantage and luxury life affords, yet everywhere they look, something is lacking or incomplete. Nothing is ever quite good enough. Nothing is ever satisfactory. Nothing completely fills the bill. The cup never overflows, no matter how much is poured into it!

At the other extreme, there are some individuals who view their world so optimistically, the see their lives full, no matter what the circumstances. Surrounded by the worst of situations, they only see their blessings. Rather than dreaming of mansions, they're happy to have a meager home to call their own. Rather than owning a Mercedes, their thankful to have an old "junker" they can count on. Rather than vacations in Monte Carlo, they're content with an occasional Sunday at the local beach. They have few of the advantages and luxuries life affords, yet everywhere they look they see abundance. They view their meager home, "junker" automobile, and Sunday beach jaunts as riches that many others do not have. No matter how slightly the cup is filled, it is always seen as overflowing!

OPTIMISM ABOUT THE FUTURE

The final tense of optimism is the future tense.

Not only do happy people see their past and present in optimistic terms, they also see their future as being bright and promising.

Here is where optimism truly becomes the "saving grace" of happy people. No matter how bleak and desperate things might appear in the present, a belief in a better future appears to be essential for a person to go forward in life.

In this sense, at least, most everyone tends to be more optimistic than pessimistic. According to the research, most Americans appear to be optimistic about their individual future (9, 87, 130). Although the figures are down somewhat in the last few years, all national opinion polls conducted over the last four decades, show that the vast majority of Americans are optimistic about the future of the world, as well as their own particular circumstances. Most people think things in the future will be better. But this general faith in the future is nothing to compared to the optimism happy people display...

Just like the way they view their past and present, the way happy people look at their future tends to be of a much stronger and more pervasive quality than the modest optimism most others possess about the future. This unshakable faith in a bright and improved future not only involves the long-term perspective, it tends to permeate the immediate future as well. Consider the following situations...

You get a notice from the postal authority regarding a certified letter. Have you won a big give-away? Or are you being sued?

For the first time since you've been working for the company, your boss invites you to join him for lunch. Is it a promotion he has in mind, or are you about to be fired?

You get a message from your tax preparer to call immediately. Are you about to be audited, or did a larger than expected refund come your way?

The principal at your child's school has been trying to reach you all day. Has your child been in an accident? Or has you child been selected for a national award?

Your sweetheart leaves you a little note which says, "You're going to get it tonight!" Are you in for a special treat? Or are you in for a serious chewing-out?

Who knows what the future holds? But in the meantime, how happy you remain depends on how you interpret things. Certainly the worst could happen. You're about to be sued, your boss is about the fire you, the IRS is going to audit you, your child's been in an accident, and you're going to get a big scolding from your spouse. But why stew in misery when a positive outcome might be at hand? Perhaps you have won a contest; maybe you're about to get a promotion; possibly you get a large tax refund; perhaps your child has been selected for an award; and maybe your sweetheart has a special evening in mind.

Arguably, you'd be a lot happier as you go through life if you could anticipate upcoming events more positively, no matter how they actually turn out. If the worst happens, you can deal with it then. But until you know for sure, why let pessimistic predictions make you unhappy?

A UNIQUE EXPECTATION

Optimism regarding the future is, in essence, a belief that things will always turn-out for the best. It is a faith that the future holds a brighter and more fruitful day for all of us. It is an expectation that life always progresses through it's immediate ups and downs to a higher and better plane.

Yet, how can this kind of view lead to happiness when, as we saw in the last chapter, that high expectations tend to lead to disappointment?

Indeed, there appears to be quite a conflict between what we are saying now and what we introduced in the previous chapter on "Lower Your Expectations and Aspirations." Here we are indicating that optimism regarding the future is an expectations that events will turn-out positively. Yet earlier, we suggested that such high expectations tend to lead to unhappiness. As both high optimism and low expectations are typical of happiness according to the data, it would seem as if we have a mystery on our hands...

At first glance, it would look like optimism, as the anticipation of a bright future, runs counter to the theory of low expectations and aspirations we just discussed. We just saw that high expectations create disappointments when actual circumstances fall below those expectations. So how can high optimism have just the opposite effect? We'd expect the optimist, with his high general expectations of life, would find actual events disappointing. Yet apparently this is not the case, since highly optimistic people are happy. Where lies the explanation?

The difference, apparently, centers on the specificity of the expectation...

Most of the expectations people hold are rather specific. For example, "Tomorrow I expect to be given that important assignment at the office" or "I just know my team will win the big game Friday." But the expectation inherent in the optimism happy people have is rather general and nonspecific. The optimist simply predicts that things will "work out for the best."

If a specific outcome is expected, happiness depends entirely on how things eventuate. Say you don't get that important assignment -- or your team looses the big game -- these outcomes will certainly make for disappointment.

But what if the expectation was more general, like "whatever happens is for the best"? Then it doesn't matter whether you get the assignment or not. Either way you win! The same with the big game: whether your team wins or looses, it must be for the best!

Yes, optimism about the future is a high expectation, but it is so nonspecific that it cannot be voided by actual circumstance. The optimist believes that "things" will turn out for the "best." Such a prediction is so general that virtually any outcome will fulfill it. Indeed, optimism is not dependent on actual outcomes at all. No matter how things go, the optimistic prediction always comes true!

A person with high expectations, for example, thinks "I've got to get that promotion, or I'll be a miserable failure." The person high in optimism thinks, "Whether or not I get that promotion, things will work out for the best."

The person with high expectations, says, "I won't ever be happy unless I get into Medical School." The optimist says, "No matter whether I get into Medical School or not, I'm going to be happy."

The person with high expectations believes, "If I can't marry Pat, my life will be a tragedy." The optimist believes, "Whether Pat marries me or not, life will be okay."

Optimism is, apparently, an expectation that is not tied to specific outcomes. Optimism is a flexible expectation -- it is a blanket which covers any eventuality with a positive spin. Optimism, therefore, provides the freedom for an individual to transcend the actual events of life. It severs the connection between the happenstance of life and the happiness one can potentially experience. An optimistic expectation about the future is always fulfilled, thus the luck and chance of life's occurrences come to loose their grip on our happiness.

Ultimately, an optimistic perspective is real freedom from from the unhappy twists and turns of life. If one can truly believe that "things always turn out for the best," or that "every cloud has it's silver lining," or any of the other old homilies which stress an optimistic view of events, one can find happiness in any circumstance.

THE SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY

An optimistic view of future events can go beyond the interpretation of things that happen, it can actually contribute to a more positive outcome of the events themselves!

Psychology has extensively written about the phenomenon called "the self-fulfilling prophecy." It is based on the well-documented fact that prophecies we make about future events often become true because we make them come true.

For example, we prophesize that we are going to fail our Algebra course -- and sure enough, we do. We predict that no one is going to like us at our new job, and sure enough, they don't. We get roped into attending a fancy cocktail-party. We're convinced we're going to have a lousy time -- and sure enough, we have a lousy time.

Now if such things happen often, we might be tempted to attribute such inspired forecasts to a mystic or psychic power we possess. After all, how can we predict such future outcomes with such uncanny accuracy?

The answer is: we subconsciously make it happen!

Unwittingly, we tend to fulfill our own prophecy. Take the above hypothetical...

You've certain you're going to fail Algebra. Your conviction makes you highly nervous in class -- you're so apprehensive that it's difficult to concentrate. You hardly bother to study, since you're sure that it's useless. Your fear paralyzes you when you take the exams. And sure enough, you fail the class.

You're convinced that no one is going to like you at your new job. You, therefore, approach your first day there nervous and cautious. You don't speak to anyone unless it's necessary; you don't bother to try and make social conversation; you react with skepticism at friendly advances by your new coworkers; and you generally convey an aloof and cold personality. Sure enough, by the end of the day, your new coworkers have decided they don't like you.

You just know you're going to have a lousy time at the cocktail party, thus you arrive in a negative frame of mind. You're reluctant to converse with anyone. You feel uncomfortable being so dressed-up. You isolate yourself in a corner, thinking about the movie you're missing on the cable channel. Others sense your disinterested mood and ignore you. And sure enough, you have a lousy time.

Clearly these outcomes weren't a matter of precognition, they simply happened because the predictions made them happen. Once a prophecy has been made, our mind takes over. If the prophecy is believed strongly enough, then we will act and behave accordingly. If we act and behave in ways that are consistent with the forecast which the prophecy contains, then wheels are set in motion to increase the likelihood that the prophecy will, in fact, come true.

Optimism and pessimism about the future are the ultimate extension of such "self-fulfilling prophecies." A person who makes the pessimistic prophecy that "today is going to be a lousy day" will probably act so negatively, defensively, and suspiciously that it will tend to create the "lousy day" he or she predicted. The person, however, who makes the optimistic prophecy that "today is going to be a great day" may well be so cheerful, enthusiastic, and productive that it will work to create a happy day, indeed!

POSITIVE THINKING

The second major aspect to Fundamental Seven is positive thinking. Here, we pick-up on a theme we introduced earlier in our chapter on Fundamental Five ("Stop Worrying"). In that discussion, we suggested that happiness has often been defined as a "state of mind where one's thinking is pleasant most of the time."

To refresh our memory, let's briefly outline the propositions regarding happiness we suggested then...

First, happiness is nothing more than an emotion -- an abiding feeling of well-being and contentment. It is a global feeling, but it is collectively based upon the thousands of specific feelings we experience every day, as they balance-out over time.

Second, the everyday feelings which build or deplete our overall happiness are partially accounted for by the kinds of thoughts which preoccupy our mind. Ample evidence shows that positive thoughts produce positive emotions and negative thoughts produce negative emotions -- and in a measurable way, our happiness appears to be directly contingent on the positively or negativity of our daily thought-patterns over the months and years.

Third, overall happiness can be attacked on a minute by minute basis. To the degree that happiness is like a "time clock" (where more time is spent in positive, than negative, thought), then, every additional minute one can manage to spend in a positive frame of mind, the happier one will be.

To accomplish this, several simultaneous strategies can be employed...

One way is to reduce the amount of negative thinking which intrudes upon one's mental day. Here, we have already made some progress when we discussed ways to "Stop Worrying" a few Chapters ago. Later in this volume, when we talk about "Eliminate Negative Feelings," we'll pursue this strategy even further.

Another way to focus the mind on more positive thoughts is to live a fuller life. Here, the first four Fundamentals are appropriate. Our previous discussions of "Be More Active," "Spend More Time Socializing," "Be Productive at Meaningful Work," and "Get Better Organized" each describe excellent strategies to positively focus our mind through enjoyable, involving pursuits.

Presently, in this chapter, our analysis of optimism has shown yet another strategy. As we have seen, developing an optimistic perspective provides a way to interpret the past, present, and future in positive terms. Here we have seen that an optimistic slant on things can fill the mind with many more happy impressions than unhappy ones.

But now we come to the ultimate strategy: focusing on positive thoughts directly!

WE SEE WHAT WE'RE LOOKING FOR

As crucial as optimism is to happiness, optimism itself, is just one form of positive thinking. Optimism, as we have seen, is primarily interpretative. It takes actual events in the past, the present, or the imagined future and views them in the best light possible.

Positive thinking, however, is larger in scope. It involves the entire spectrum of one's mental life. It involves not only how one views events -- it involves what events you actually view.

Every Freshman psychology student is familiar with term "selective perception." It is one of the rudiments of basic psychology. Essentially, it is the established fact that human beings tend to see things pretty much as they want or expect them to be, rather than what's really there.

Each of us tend to see reality in terms of our needs, our values, our fears, our ambitions, and our background. Thus, no two individuals see the circumstances of life quite the same way.

In a real sense, particularly given the essential "neutrality of events" we described earlier, each of us are forced to distort our "world" in terms of our own individual needs and desires -- as well as our hopes and fears. And, it appears that we human beings do a terrific job of it! As Berelson and Stiener found years ago, in their classic review of social science research, Human men and women are masters at distorting their reality! Speaking of the typical man (or woman), they wrote:

"...he adjusts his social perception to fit not only objective reality but also what suits his wishes and needs; he tends to remember what fits his needs and expectations, or what he thinks others will want to hear; he not only works for what he wants but wants what he has to work for, his need for psychological protection is so great that he has become expert in the defense mechanisms; in the mass media he tends to see and hear not simply what is there but what he prefers to be told, and he will misinterpret rather than face up to an opposing set of facts or point of view; he avoids conflicts of issues and ideals by changing the people around him rather than his mind; and he thinks his organization ranks higher than it actually does and that his own group agrees with him more fully than it does." (Berelson & Steiner, 1964, p. 664).

We humans are the masters of self-deception.Simply put, we're constantly distorting or perceptions of reality to make it fit more in line with what we need and expect it to be. And one of the major psychological processes we bring to bear in this effort is "selective perception" -- or what we're looking to find.

To demonstrate this, look closely at a representation of the world I've constructed below::

NORTH
- + + - +
- + - + - + - +
- + - - - + -  + - + - +
- + - + + + + - + - - + - +
+ - + + + - - + - - - - + + - + +
WEST  - + + + + - - + + - - + - - + + - + - +   EAST
+ - - + - - + +  - + - + - - + +
- + - + + + - -  - + - + - + 
- + + - - + + + - + +
- + - + + + - + 
- + - + - 
SOUTH

Pretty poor graphic, I agree (and it may look worse in your particular browser or print-out). Novertheless, consider it as a graphic representation of the real world as we humans tend to universally intrepret it.

As you can see, the world, as we learn to view it, is filled with both positive and negative things. It is covered with many plusses, representing the many wonderful, kind, and loving occurrences which happen every day. It is also covered with many minuses, which represent the many sins, inequities, and tragedies of the world. When you look at it, its easy to see the total picture at a glance, both god and bad...

But imagine this picture being multiplied several million times. Then, it would be impossible to see the "total picture." Your view of the world would come to be based, exclusively, on which elements you happened to focus upon. Clearly, such a million-fold magnification would provide all the opportunities needed for you to isolate and focus upon nothing but negative things -- if that's what you're interested in looking for. Argueably, there is so much truly bad in the world, you could be preoccupied virtually every moment of every day concentrating on it.

On the other hand, if all you are looking for is the good, there is plenty of that too. No matter how the plusses and minuses alter, there is enough good in the world to hold your attention 24-hours a day, every day.

It's all a matter of what you're looking for!

The world is filled with so many wondrous things. It is also filled with so many horrors. There is hatred, war, starvation, poverty, and disease. There is also love, altruism, family, creativity, and beauty. There is enough in the "real world" to keep your mind occupied practically every minute of every day with either positive things or negative things.

No one can disagree with the fact that, if you wish to, there's enough disgusting and disheartening things going on in the world to keep hold your mental attention 24-hours a day. Yet, on the other hand, there's no doubt that there are also enough good and wonderful things in this world to keep your attention equally as occupied -- every minute of every day.

The point is: which will you choose to focus on?

The choice is clear when it comes to happiness. Happy people, according to the research, naturally tend to focus upon the positive things around them. As a result, they tend to preoccupy their minds with a many more pleasant thoughts and memories; and because of this, they end up happier still. Unhappy people, by contrast, seem only to see the negatives in life. As a result, their minds are mired in the unhappy events which surround them, perpetuating their already unhappy mental state.

A PENNY FOR YOUR THOUGHTS

Thus far, our discussion of positive, optimistic thinking has revolved around the outside world -- the perceptions, interpretations, and selective views we have of theexternal events, circumstances, and stimuli that preoccupy our mental lives. Such outside occurrences are known to psychology as "triggers," and such "triggers" probably stimulate the majority of our mental attention.

Yet, depending on the situation at hand, a good percentage of our mental life is determined internally. In these instances, our mind is our own. Here, we make our own assessment of the people and events around us. Here we think of our own private jokes. Here we imagine how other's are receiving us. Here is where we decide how we feel about them. Here, we can be given to daydreams and fantasy. Here is where we are given to introspection, remembrance, and thoughts of a personal nature. And it is only here that the true content of our thinking patterns can really be assessed.

The question for our present topic is simple: in these private moments, how positive or negative is your thinking?

For the happier people we've studied the answer is clear. Most of the thoughts which spontaneously enter their minds are highly positive. And this is part of the reason they are so happy.

A mind filled with pleasant thoughts is a happy mind. So, train yourself to spend more of your mental day in pleasant thinking, like happy people do.

IT'S SIMPLY A MATTER OF TRAINING

Becoming more positive and optimistic, as happy people are, is simply a matter of training. Anyone can learn to be more positive and optimistic. You just have to practice at it!

Of course one of the more powerful techniques to positive thinking is the "thought switching technique" we discussed earlier in our chapter on Fundamental Five, "Stop Worrying." Here, however, let me suggest an additional approach. This technique deals with how you interpret actual situations...

As we saw in the last chapter on "Lower Your Expectations and Aspirations," most of our disappointments in life fall into our high expectations in three categories: high expectations of events; high expectations of others; and high expectations of ourselves These are also the three major categories in which most people's thoughts tend to dwell: events, others, and ourselves. Few of our everyday thoughts fall outside these three basic topics, thus if one wants to begin to "develop their positive thinking," here are the best places to begin.

Imagine you have two sets of eye glasses you could wear in any situation. One is the proverbial "rose colored" glasses of optimism. The other is the "blue colored" glasses of pessimism. Imagine further that you could relive every event in your life again and again, with one or the other of these sets of glasses on. How happily or how bleakly would life look?

Let's start our analysis with events...

Consider everything that happened today. Write down every actual event you remember. How did things go in the morning after you awoke? What happened throughout the day? What happened when you got home? Did anything out of the ordinary occur during the day? Write anything and everything you can remember down.

For demonstration purposes, let me cite an example one of my students wrote in a classroom exercise:

"I woke by my alarm clock. I had accidentally set it earlier than usual. I had my morning coffee, showered and dressed, and had breakfast. I made it to work earlier than usual. The work-load was higher than normal, thus I didn't have a chance to go to lunch. By late-afternoon, tension around the workplace had grown, but the boss seemed tremendously pleased with our efforts. After work, a few of us got together, and I happened to run into an old friend who's making a fortune in real estate. At home, later, my spouse and I had left-overs for dinner and watched a great movie on HBO. Just before bed, I wrote-out a few checks to pay my monthly credit-card bills. Then I snuggled-up to my spouse for a night's sleep... "

How would you view a day such as this? Was it a "good" day, or a "horrible" one?

It's all in how you learn to interpret it!

First, let's look at this student's day with our "blue glasses" on. What's wrong with this day? Practically everything! He had to wake up early. Furthermore, he had only yourself to blame because he mis-set his clock. He got to work earlier than was necessary. He had to work harder than usual, and missed lunch altogether. Tension on the job ran high. He ran into an old friend who is doing much better than he is. He had left-overs for dinner, and spent the few hours left in his day paying bills...

Looking at it in this light, it looks as if our student had a pretty rotten day!

But now, let's re-examine the same day with our "rose-colored glasses." Here, we can see the exact same day in a positive light...

He was lucky enough to show up to work early on one of the busiest work-days of the year (and his boss was tremendously pleased). Although he missed lunch, his productivity was at an all-time peak. He was quite happy to run-into an old, dear friend. He watched a great movie on HBO, had a decent dinner, had enough money left in his bank-account to pay his bills, and at the end of the day was able to snuggle-up to a loyal mate and slumber, after one of the better days of his life!

To teach yourself in the same manner, start logging a series of your own days in a detail. Then, later, experiment by analyzing each of the days by looking at them through the "blue" and "rose" glasses.

Practice with any situation you can conjure. First, put on your "blue glasses" and pick-apart everything you can find that is wrong with it. Then practice with your "rose glasses" to see all the positive aspects of the same situation.

You can practice with any situation. Take any television show you watch, for example. After viewing, mentally review it looking for every negative thing you can remember about the program. Then, do the same noting every good thing you recall.

You can practice, as well, any moment of your day, by simply taking a short "time out" to evaluate both the good and bad points of your immediate situation.

More and more, as you practice, it will become clearer to you how differently the events of life can be viewed!

Next, turn your thoughts to others...

You can use the same glasses in viewing those around you. Imagine each of them as viewed through the "rose-colored" and "blue colored" lenses. Here again, you'll probably find a tremendous difference in your view.

There's little doubt that even the most vile of human beings has a few redeeming traits about them, and most people, I believe, have many more good qualities than bad ones. It's all a matter of looking for them...

With practice, your view of others can become significantly more positive -- and such a view clearly helps to contribute to a happier outlook on life.

Yet, interestingly, there is an additional pay-off gained by adopting a more positive view of others: they tend to live-up to it!

There is abundant research evidence that suggests that people tend to respond to positive expectations about them by attempting to fulfill them. It is at the heart of modern behavioral psychology: your effect in changing people is much more potent if you simply look for and praise the positive efforts they make, rather than criticizing and punishing the mistakes they make.

You'd be amazed how effectively you can change behavior when you encourage and reward positive behavior. You probably already know how much people tend to resist change when they are forced, punished, criticized, or humiliated to do so. Even if they comply, their heart really isn't into it. On the other hand, you also know from personal experience how encouraging and motivating a little recognition or praise can be.

So, look for the good in other people. Not only will it help you have a happier outlook, but looking for other's good points can actually bring out those very qualities in them!

Finally, turn your "glasses" on yourself...

Just like events -- just like other people -- you, too, are a combination of both good and bad attributes. You could, as many people choose to do, spend all you time concentrating on yourself with your "blue glasses" -- focusing only on your bad points and wallow in self-criticism. But, the happy, "pink glasses" alternative is to ignore your shortcomings and focus your attention on your good qualities -- spending your mental time in pleasant thoughts about yourself. You'll find, as you concentrate more on your good points, that you'll begin liking yourself better -- and liking yourself is an important happiness quality that we'll be talking at length about under a later Fundamental.

The more you practice with your imaginary glasses, the more apparent it will be to you how differently your world can look. It may a shock to find how drastic a difference it is, especially if one of these new ways at looking at the world are different from your more typical view of things. But therein lies the point! Without opening our eyes to an alternative way of viewing our lives, we would never question the way we ordinarily see it. And we would never discover how happily it might be viewed!

A BLESSINGS LIST

The ultimate conclusion to such an positive appraisal of one's life lies in an honest assesment of one's actual circumstances -- or what many call a "blessings list."

How are you blessed? Especially compared to others who are less fortunate?

Here, the strategy is to work on a listing of all the positives you have in your life. For most of us, such a list should be virtually endless. To begin with, most of us could begin with the most modest of blessings:

I have a place to sleep and enough food to eat..

I have decent car (or regular form of transportation).

I have people who love me.

I have enough to get by, financially.

I've got a close family.

I have beautiful nature around me.

I have achieved success.

My children are healthy and happy.

Indeed, many of us living in the developed nations, could easily list hundreds of more specific, material and non-material "blessings" (like the homes we own; the swimming pools, fine jewelry, household furniture, and other property we might possess; the educational and economic opportunities we enjoy; the liberties of freedom and fair justice our governments may provide; etc.)

The list of such positive things in one's life should be in the hudreds, if one examines it closely:

I've got a great job!

What a nice neighborhood I live in.

I've got great friends!

We're so proud of our daughter!

The weather here is the best in the country...

I love my new coffee table

I have the most fashionalble wardrobe in town!

I had a bit-part in the movie Star Wars.

Well, all but the last one , for most of us...

It's almost futile to even start listing the thousands of potential "blessings" any person might find appropriate to their personal list. It migh take hundreds of extra pages of suggestions just to scratch the surface, for no list or examples could even come close to including the special "blessings" which might be particularly yours.

To demonstrate,  just look around the room you're in now. Wherever you happen to be reading this Chapter, there's certain to be abundant reminders of "blessings" you have in your life. Virtually every object likely represents a "blessing" you might list -- a happy memory -- a family achievement -- a long-sought possesstion -- a religious object of significance -- and so on...

And how about the computer that's bringing this "on-line" book to you now? Another "blessing?"  Well, I'd like to think that that it's the first thing you thought of when you started your list.

Its almost impossible, if you honestly examine it, not to find hundreds and hundreds of specific "blessings" in your life, no matter what your, more objective circumstances actually are.

But this is only half the story of the "blessings list."   Contrary to all thats been suggested in this Chapter, it's time to think negatively. For, in addition to all the positive things you can think of that are going well in your life, an adaquate "blessings list" should also include all of the horrific and traumatic things that have never happened to you on the back page!

This list, too, is virtually endless:

My home has never been struck by a hurricane, fire, tornado, or other natural disaster.

My taxes have never been audited.

I've never lived in a "crime-filled" neighbohood.

I was never abused by my parents.

I've never faced public humiliation for my failures.

I've never suffered a major accidental injury.

I've never been struck by lightening, hit by a torronado, or stuck by a falling asteriod or piece of space debris.

I've never been imprisoned or tortured.

I've never been in a major airline or train crash.

I've never been a victim of a violent crime.

No one in my family has ever been hit with "mad-cow disease."

There's no end to such a list, either. Nor can there be! If we pay attention, the Network News and Local Papers are filled with stories of new diseases, criminal scams, environmental polution, murder, and natural disaster -- any of which might bring horrific concequences for us and our loved-ones, if we were affected directly. And tragically, for millions of people around the world, annually, crime, natural distaster, war and disease cause incalcuable human suffering and death every year.

Still, if such peronal or natural catatotrophies haven't stricken ourselves or people we love directly, we should consider ourselves very lucky!

And so one should!

Most of us in the West are very lucky. We live very fortunate lives. We only need to compare ouselves to the most poor, infirmed, and despondant throughout the world to see this is so.

When you make a list of all  the "good things" in your life and compare it to a list of all the horribly "bad things" that have never touched your life at all,  you're well on your way to a more optimistic view of life!

The problem with this is that few of us ever take the time to consider our "blessings" as we scurry about in our day-to-day lives. Immediate pressures, activities, and problems preoccupy most of our mental efforts and thoughts. We rarely take time to examine our lives, and when we do our human psychology has a strong tendency to overlook its positives...

One of the most basic human (and animal) characteristics psychologists have identified is called "the adaption effect."

The adaption effect, simply stated, is the very natural tendency of all organisms to become quite used to their situation -- and, subsequently, to experience it as normal and expected. In everyday terms, we humans become used to our regular circumstances -- and thus take them for granted!

For example...

We move into a new home. We're thrilled and excited! But after a number of months, we become adapted to it -- and after a year or two we hardly notice the change at all. The thrill and excitement have dissipated. Our home is now an ordinarily and unnoticed part of our routine life. We've come to take it for granted.

In other words, once we become adapted to something, we no longer notice all the wonderful aspects of the situation that entrhralled us about it in the first place!

But here's the worst part: once we become adapted to something there is another strong human tendency to start focusing on it's lacks and   shortcomings. Now we start noticing more of the defects in the home..

The bedrooms are too small. The kitchen's too big. The windows don't look right. The garage should have been on the far side. Etecetera...

In a way, this psychological tendency defies logic. You would suppose that it would be far more natural to notice what's there, rather than what's absent. But Human Nature is such! The more used to a circumstance we become, the more our attention turns to what's wrong with it. We focus more on what's not there -- rather than what's there! Especially where our "blessings" in life are concerned.

It's a vicious cycle. At first we feel thrilled and blessed -- then we start to adapt, but remain somewhat pleased -- later, as we completely adapt, we take the situation for granted with little notice or thought -- and finally dissatisfaction creeps in, as our attention begins to focus more on the lacks and shortcomings the situation affords.

This is a quite human, psychological cycle. But it represents one of the major barriers in becoming a more optimistic, positive-thinking person.

Here, then, is where a thoughtful "blessings list" comes in...

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS -- REGULARLY!

We should consider our "blessings" rather regularly -- perhaps daily for a moment or two. And that's where an adaquate "blessings list" can assist...

Perhaps every week or so, one should spend a bit of time looking over (and perhaps adding to) their personal "blessings list" -- taking time to deeply absorb and relish each item for a moment or two. Another tactic might be to place little "post-it" notes around the house -- each with a single "blessing" on it -- to briefly focus one's positive thoughts throuought the day. Or, perhaps, carrying with you a small stack of index cards -- each containing a "blessing" -- and ponder one for a short bit at various times as you go about your daily routine.

These are quite similar to the kinds of techniques we first discussed in the Fundamental "Stop Worrying" -- and there are other ideas in that earlier Chapter apppropriate here, as well.  The idea, of course, is to use these -- or other strategies you might think of yourself -- to gradually train yourself to think mor positively and optimistically. And continue doing so, until they become a genuine habit!

HOW OPTIMISTIC AND POSITIVE CAN ONE GET?

Can you become too optimistic positive in their thinking? I personally doubt it, but it's nothing for most of us to concern ourselves with.

A few around the world devote their entire lives as religious monastics or secular meditionalists attempting to completely conquer and subdue the negative thoughts in their minds  -- and even few among these would avow complete success in their effort. Others, have found themselves in catastrophatic conditions during their lives, and have found redemption in their mental ability to focus their mind on the positive (Victor Frankl's inspirational book, Man's Search For Meaning [citing] -- an autobiography of his experience in a Nazi concentration camp -- among others, comes to mind).

Only the very rare among us are able to truly approach an ultimate state of transcendant, mental positivity.

For most of us, however, a little improvement can glean significant happiness benefits...

BEING HAPPY NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS

In the final analysis, however, transcendence is the ultimate quest. For in the most important sense of all, optimism and positive thought simply boils-down to a simple affirmation:

No matter what actually happens, I'll be happy!

In it's finest meaning, "Devolop Your Positive, Optimistic Thinking" teaches that our mind and our thoughts create the ultimate sense of the realities we find ourselves in. And given the choice we all have, we can choose whether to view these realities as "heaven" or "hell."

Given this natural power any of us can exercise and develop, the true transcendence of actual life is possible...

After all, human happiness is nothing more than an internal psychological experience. It only exists in our mind. And though our minds have evlolved to react to outside ciremstances to guide our survival through life, there's no psychological reason for these outside stimuli to completely determine our consious experience. We have a lot of conscious say in the matter, if we decide to exercise and develop our mental rigor.

So why not say: "I'm going to be happy, no matter what happens!"